How a Place Becomes a Home

Hello from our Texas HOME. The doors are open, the fruit tress are blooming, and I have my morning coffee with a side of a Leon Bridges playing. Home is a funny thing, we can enjoy many pieces of a place, yet we all know that somewhat indescribable feeling of comfort when suddenly the place you are begins to feel like an all too familiar comfy chair and you begin to settle in to home.

 It doesn’t feel so long ago that I was on the phone with my mother-in-law, telling her how much (here’s my radical honesty) I HATED living here. And just around the time that the new year rolled in and our two year anniversary of living in HTX arrived, I noticed those feelings had begun to melt away, making room for the space in my heart to take a breath, and call Houston home.

For those of you who have moved, maybe you know the feeling, or are in the middle of it right now. When we first moved, it felt like all things I loved about Boston were the exact opposite of what makes Houston, Houston.  Now as I stand here reflecting and feeling excited to go to the Rodeo Cookoff today (quite a Texas thing if I do say so myself), I recall similar feelings about Boston. When I arrived, it absolutely wasn’t what I had pictured in my head, and for a good majority of the time I lived there, I told myself this was just a stopover, surely not my forever home. But right around the time I passed the two year mark in Bean Town, and just as I realized I would be moving so soon, I found myself clinging to all of the things I loved so dearly about this place I had come to call home.

I absolutely believe how we dress can help us connect with ourselves and be influenced by where we are. Hat (Communitie Marfa) and earrings from Forth and Nomad

 While I had heard it before, and lived it once myself, I seemed to have forgotten how magical that two year marker is. I forget how long it take to build a home or space that feels like you, find a routine of places that fit you, and most certainly finding your people and growing those relationships takes time too. I’ve found great joy in reflecting on the things that have grown during these Texas years that make my heart now feel so at peace. So no matter where on the “home” journey you are, perhaps this list can help you take a moment to recognize them too:

We even found a cactus ;)

Pieces that Built our Home:

1. Our People

   We have been so lucky to find people we can count on, who talk with and support you in all parts of life, not just the surface level ones. We have friends who have become family, who’ve introduced us and shared memories with their families. We’ve celebrated weddings, supported big life changes like school and jobs and moves, and we talk about our mental health and relationships too. We have neighbors who all call each other when we need something like a hand with our dogs. And while our Houston community may not be large, it is oh so big to us.

2. Our Home

   Will and I realized that we have not lived in a consistent house/apartment for more than two years since high school…until now. Our snug little 700sqft apartment has become a space that feels like who we are. It is a spot we can welcome our people into, and make memories as a little family of three. (Houston also brought us Mia Bean!) Our green couch has been the spot of many a drinks and conversations, and the personal touches that perfectly match Will and I warms my heart every day.

3. Slowing Down and Loving People

   I’ve noticed Texas has this thing about it where it feels a bit like a deep breath, a smile, and a slow sunny day. It seems like there is such an emphasis on slowing down, enjoying great food and drinks, being in good company, and loving people well. People bring their kids and their dogs just about everywhere. Will and I often talk about how there is such a feeling of comfort about how life is supposed to be enjoyed here. We also love the focus on people being together…and let me tell ya. The food!

4. Our Purpose

   I’m a firm believer that finding things that make you want to get up each day and speak to your strengths can fill your life in such a positive way. It doesn’t mean each day is easy (let me tell you social work is one heavy on the heart field) but it gives you a little bit of your place in the world. You can absolutely tell Will loves the work that he does, and my eyes just light up sharing about this new Social Work and Mental Health journey that I am on. Whatever your “thing” looks like, having the opportunity to make it a part of your life helps you feel planted.

5. Our Spots

   Over the years, we’ve found our places and that comfort of familiar spots that still bring you excitement each time you go is a feeling I never want to take for granted. We have an incredible therapist and therapy community that have become such an important part of our life together. We can take a walk, something we love to do, in our neighborhood to get some of the best tacos I’ve ever had. On weekend mornings, we visit Penny Quarter, an intimate Houston restaurant with some of the best coffee, breakfast, and staff you’ll find, the kind who make you feel like you’re walking into their home, and the three of us enjoy our mornings listening to their music under the live oak trees. And of course there are many more.

6. The Weather

   Finally, I would be mistaken if I didn’t talk about the outdoors. We are constantly asked if it gets too hot in the summer. Sure it gets up there, but it really doesn’t bother either of us. Being outside, feeling sunshine, and seeing green is something we both love. And if drinking frozen gin and tonics outside with your best friends the first week of the year is any indication, Houston does a pretty good job of letting us be there. And the trees here are one of my favorite things in the world. 

As I’m writing I think there are many other things we might like too. Like how people wear caftans a lot…I’m really into that! Or that we can drive old vintage cars around…here’s hoping that’s in our future. I’m not sure where our future will lead, but I do know that Texas has gone from being one of the furthest things from home, to showing me what home really means.