Guest of Honor: Talkin Feelings at Home with Will

One of the questions we get asked most often is “what is it like living with a therapist?” While I’m still in school and not technically a therapist just yet, I do love to talk about feelings. And while my husband Will and I absolutely share likes and interests in common, if you know us our personalities can be pretty different too. So how does that play out at home, and what does it mean for you?

Will and I sat down to chat about what’s worked well for us in our relationship and at home. We know that whether you’re simply just spending a lot of time at home right now, you’re newly dating or married, or just looking to grow with your partner, feeling like you can share your whole head and heart at home is really nice. And we both totally believe that keeping that line of connection with each other is important.

Over time, we’ve gotten really curious to learn how to talk, support, and be with one another. And during this episode we are sharing some of those specifics with you!

Talking about how we're really feeling at home is nice. But how often do we really do it? On today's episode, my husband Will and I chat about some ways we've been able to relax, bring our whole selves into our house and relationship, and support each other in the process.

If you’d like to follow along outside of the blog, the podcast is currently available on Anchor, Spotify, and other sources.

Check out Morgan Weber’s Instagram here to find the Eight Row Margarita Recipe! Be sure to follow Eight Row too!

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Want to chat about some of this with your partner? Use this tips to get started!

1. Remember this is meant to be a curiosity about one another. Think of it like something fun to explore to keep things respectful and conversational.

2. Have each person share how they best like to be supported when you have an exciting day, or something good happen. Do you really appreciate hearing how proud your partner is? Would you prefer a special meal to celebrate?

3. When it’s a hard day, how do you best feel supported from you partner? In our house, Will does a great job acknowledging it and talking it out with phrases like “That is really hard” and suggesting some things that make me feel good, like a long shower to myself. Think of this like a tool kit. What can you ask your partner to put inside so they’re ready to lend a hand when those days come?

4. Are there any topics that are really hard for you to talk about? Have a little fun with this one! These have always become some of our funniest, or some times most interesting and best conversations! Maybe it’s good old passin wind or the bathroom. Maybe it’s admitting when you’re wrong that’s really hard to talk about. Maybe figuring out how to have honest conversations about what you need from your partner feels like you’re being hurtful so you don’t. Remember this is a time to explore what’s not on the table. And maybe by talking it out or sitting with it, you can explore some ways with your partner that feels good to bring it to the table.

5. Finally! Wrap things up with “how do you best feel loved?” When I see Will lovin on Mia and the three of us are hanging out together, my heart is so incredibly full. I thrive off of words of affirmation, so Will takes time to write really thoughtful notes to me as a way to express how he feels, and those mean the world. (If I’m needing extra I can even say “I’m needing some words of affirmation”…another one of our jokes that has actually become really useful!) For Will, if he asks for something every so often, even really simple, “like would you mind helping out with that?” I know that if he’s asking it means something to him, and by hoppin on it it shows I care.

Bonus: get curious about different phrases you can use to give each other a heads up about what you’re needing like we talk about in the episode. This includes “I statements” (I feel sad when…) or calling on Dr. Brene Brown with “The story I’m telling myself is…” to acknowledge that how we are feeling might not reflect the whole reality, but our feelings are valid and worthy of talking about.

It certainly takes time, it takes knowing that you are learning something everyday, and probably always will be. But we absolutely believe in the joy of being able to bring your whole self to your relationship and home. We hope some of these tips are helpful to you. We think you’re really brave for showing up for one another, and we would love to learn from you! Any ways that you show up for your partner? Talk about those feelings? Comment below to share your tips!

Happy Chatting,

Tayler